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Steve Dupont

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Prediction Edition

Prediction Edition

With the conventions fast approaching (although not fast enough), I figure I might as well throw out some predictions. Just remember, you heard it here first.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

First let's talk about the so-called "Veepstakes." I really hate that term for some reason, probably because it's actually pretty clever.

McCAIN's PICK:  Mitt Romney

Despite the fact that he's much younger, taller, better looking, better spoken and more charming, the McCain camp will go with the presidential loser from Mass. At least he's not as funny as McCain, which is really saying something. Bad. About Romney. He's maybe never said a funny thing in his life, on purpose.

But that aside, Romney does have the "brand" of being strong on economic issues, which is arguably both the top concern of Americans (as it rightly should be) and McCain's Achilles heel.

Also, Romney ostensibly brings with him a cadre of loyal voters, although outside of Mormons I'm not sure who these people are ... at any rate, Romney would assuredly deliver Utah.

NOT INVITED TO THE DANCE:

Tim Pawlenty - Let's be honest, his name just doesn't work on the ticket, phoenetically. McCain-Pawlenty. Nope. Sorry. No offense to Mr. Pawlenty, but without knowing anything about him I'd think he was a hog judge at the Arkansas State Fair.

Joe Lieberman - There just isn't any room on the ticket for another old, cantankerous dude who has about as much oratory punch as the teacher from the Charlie Brown cartoons. Wah wah waaah, wah waaah wah wah ... Besides, Lieberman is just so agressively unlikable it's not funny.

Tom Ridge - Please. Does anyone have an impression of Ridge other than him standing in front of those ridiculous color-coded threat signs in the months/years after 9/11? Ridge may be a smart guy, who knows, but he'll always be a stooge in my book.

 

OBAMA's PICK: Hillary Clinton

Please! Please! Quiet down! I was only kidding.

On second thought, you know what? No. I wasn't kidding. Obama's going to pick Hillary and here's why. Like all campaigns since the "Rove Era" began, this one is going to be a back-alley knife fight to the death -- and I can't think of anyone I'd rather have on my side in a political knife fight (other than the Turd Blossom himself, of course) than the Clintons. Yes, they bring a lot of baggage. But, quite frankly, Obama could use someone to draw some fire from the Republicans, who, against their better judgment, will not be able to resist taking swipes at Hil and Bill.

On top of that, Hillary brings a huge campaign machine (albeit a little clunky) and, more importantly, millions upon millions of rabid followers. Namely young feminists, middle-aged feminists and old feminists. Oh, and homosexuals, but they're probably on the Obama bandwagon already. Seriously though, it's probably safe to say that Hillary's base is even more dedicated to her -- to this day -- than Obama's would have been, if the tables were turned.

Bottom line, Obama is pretty much neck and neck with McCain in the polls -- when he should be opening up a huge lead. So he needs a VP pick who's not only going to bring more votes into the fold but really fire up the hardcore liberal base.

And all that being said, it really wouldn't surprise me if he and Hillary had made a pact long ago that they'd be the ticket, no matter what happened ...

NOT INVITED TO THE DANCE:

Joe Biden - Yes, Joe Biden could be a very effective attack dog, but his propensity to contract Foot in Mouth disease also makes him a huge liability. That, and he's basically an establishment Washington hack, which is everything Obama claims NOT to be.

Tim Kaine - The Governor looks pretty good on paper, and would possibly tip the balance to Obama in Virginia, but he's not going to light a fire under anybody.

Bill Richardson - He's very likable and a member of several "inner circles," including the infamous Bohemian Grove, but I just don't think the campaign wants an all-minority ticket. Doesn't matter to me, personally, but I think the rationale is that middle Americans could possibly be convinced to vote for a black man, but not a black and a hispanic together. That's just too much diversity.

Wes Clark, Evan Bayh, Sam Nunn, etc. - Loser, boring, boring and boring.

AND THE WINNERS ARE:

Come on, did you really think I was going to tell you? What fun would that be?


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